Truth or Dare: How alcohol, drug-fuelled game tears lovers apart, ruins trust

The social game, ‘Truth or Dare’, is not new. Rather, it has been around for centuries. However, in recent times, it has seen a resurgence among young people fuelled by booze, drugs, social media, celebrities and other factors. TOFARATI IGE delves into the world of this game and its players, and its impact on society

Comedian and skit maker, Ganiyu Morufu, aka Ijoba Lande, left many mouths agape when he recently alleged that his wife, Dara, had cheated on him 21 times. According to him, she had had affairs with several powerful people in the entertainment industry.

In another interview, he alleged that he had a tape of actor, Babatunde Tayo, aka Baba Tee; as well as eight other men having sex (at different times) with his wife.

Though Baba Tee initially declined the allegation, he later backtracked and admitted that he had a brief (quickie) sexual encounter with Dara during a Truth or Dare session.

According to him, he met Dara when another actress, Marygold, brought her to his house and identified her as a content creator.

He revealed that he had sex with her while playing the game. In an online interview, he said, “When Marygold and Dara came to my house. She (Marygold) claimed that she wanted me to be an MC for an upcoming programme of hers despite not telling me that she was coming with anyone. She introduced Dara as a content creator, and not as Lande’s wife. They began to ask if I had a Qatar connection before the ‘Truth or Dare’ game suggestion came up.

“Immediately we began the game, Marygold went completely naked and was daring me consistently, while she kept taking alcohol as a choice of not wanting to do the tasks that I demanded from her. Rather than throwing more ‘Truth’ to me, they were hurling ‘Dare’ at me.

“Marygold now dared Dara to let me have a ‘quick’ sexual intercourse with her and she (Dara) obliged. So, the reason I said I never slept with Lande’s wife was because Marygold never introduced her as that to me, she called her a content creator. I will not deny that I had a short sexual intercourse with her, it is the first time I am saying it. It is now that I discovered that it was a set-up by both of them to malign my personality.”

He also admitted that alcohol and marijuana influenced their actions on that day.

Baba Tee’s admission raised a lot of eyebrows, and it also brought the issue of ‘Truth and Dare’ to the front burner.

The sex tape that shocked the nation

In April 2022, many watched with indignation as a female secondary school student barely in her teens could be seen on tape having sex in a room with three male classmates.

It was later reported that the act was preceded by a ‘Truth or Dare’ game in which the girl was “dared” to have sex with the male students.

The incident, which happened in Dubai, United Arab Emirates, sparked a lot of outrage, with many blaming the school authorities for failing to properly monitor the students who were in the city to represent their school in the World School Games held between March 10 and 13, 2022.

Though the mother of the pupil later claimed that her daughter was raped, the school authorities insisted otherwise.

The school maintained that the students took part in a Truth or Dare game “which led to the immoral act.”

Recalling how she got to know about the incident and the psychological impact it had on their family, the distraught mother of the female student had said, “A parent called me that she needed to see me urgently. I went to her house and she told me that something had been trending in Chrisland, and she believed I was not aware. The woman showed me the video and told me that all the parents were aware. Immediately, I informed my husband.

“When my daughter explained to me what happened, she said that they went out in the morning to have breakfast and one of the boys begged her to lend him her phone charger which she obliged. After they had dinner, the boy called her room that she should come and take her charger. She went there for her charger.

“When she got into the room, one of them said she should take her charger from the toilet; it was when she entered the toilet that they told her to take a substance, so they were all under the influence. She said after that, she did not know what she was doing again.

“Please, I am begging Nigerians to help me because Chrisland is trying to hide this issue. They are trying to push us out of the way and my daughter is affected psychologically. Please, I need help as a mother. I am begging fellow Nigerians to help me.”

Reacting to the incident, the National Association of Proprietors of Private Schools, released a statement blaming parental negligence for such acts.

“Parents are not usually present to monitor their children at home due to pressure from work and unending heavy vehicular traffic, especially in the city. This makes many parents leave home as early as 5:00 a.m. and return home from 9:00 p.m. So, there is no quality time with the children,” NAPPS president, Yomi Otubela, said.

From ‘Questions and Commands’ to ‘Truth or Dare’

According to www.truthordare.app, ‘Truth or Dare’ has its birthplace in England. Originally called ‘Questions and Commands’, the game was played by adults in the 16th century. Its purpose was to get people to confess their deepest secrets or perform outrageous tasks.

The website also noted that, “the earliest references to Questions and Commands appear in a 1677 French and English Dictionary by Guy Miege”.

It continued, “Truth or Dare is often referred to as a ‘daring game’ among street games for children, called ‘Roi qui ne ment’ in France in as early as 1345. It was even seen played at the party at Camp Laurence in the book, ‘Little Women’, published in 1868.

“Even back then, the game was a form of socialisation and creating bonds with others. Players were given the choice to either answer a thought-provoking question or perform a daring task.

“The game has also made its mark on the entertainment industry. American singer, Madonna, chose the game as the title of one of the songs in her 1991 documentary, ‘Truth or Dare’.”

Controversial singer, Habeeb Okikiola, aka Portable, who has shown himself to be quite prolific at making songs from trending issues, also released a song titled, ‘Truth or Dare’, which refers to Lande’s story.

A movie with the same name was also released in 2018, featuring American actors— Lucy Hale and Tyler Posey— as main characters who become involved in a sinister version of the game. The horror film takes the game to a whole new level as players are hunted down by supernatural forces for refusing to do their dares.

Another website, www.origin.com added that the “adventure” the game promises is one of the main reasons behind its immense popularity among all age groups.

“As the game spread across the world, it started to take on different names like “dare, dare, double dare, kiss, truth, promise” in Australia, or “truth dare, double dare, love, kiss or promise” in England,” it said.

A comeback

From childhood play dates to teenage hangouts, ‘Truth or Dare’ has indeed been a staple of social interaction for generations. However, in recent years, the game has taken on new life in Nigeria, particularly among young people; thanks to the power of social media. The combination of digital connectivity, shifting cultural norms, and an ever-growing desire for entertainment has transformed it from a simple party game into a full-fledged social phenomenon.

Traditionally, it was a game played at social gatherings, particularly among young people looking for lighthearted fun. The rules were simple: participants took turns choosing between answering a truthfully revealing question or performing a daring challenge. The game thrived in close-knit circles, where peer pressure and friendly competition heightened the excitement.

Back then, most people preferred to play such a “daring” game with people they had known for a long time, and who they were comfortable with. This was due to the fact that secrets could be revealed during those games, and there was ample chance that it could get pretty intense and intimate pretty quickly.

However, in the digital age, the game has evolved beyond the confines of living rooms and school premises. Social media platforms such as TikTok, Instagram, X, and Snapchat have amplified its reach, turning what was once a private pastime into a highly visible and interactive experience.

‘A game for the wild, daring’

Describing it as a game for the “wild and daring”, an X user, simply identified as DFaveGirl101ForReal, boasted that she had played the game several times, and even had sexual intercourse on one of those occasions.

In a chat with our correspondent, she said, “The game is not meant for everyone, and no one is forced to play it. If you know you cannot stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.

“I actually started playing the game when I was in SS3. Back then, the wildest dare was for you to kiss someone. But, when I got into the university, the game became more daring and interesting. I am an adventurous person, so I like things like that.”

Recalling the “wildest” dare she had ever carried out, the social media enthusiast said, “That happened when I was in the university. During a hostel party, we played the game and I was dared to have sex with a random guy. We were dared to have a quickie in the bathroom for five minutes. Without hesitation, I pulled the guy into the bathroom, and we had sex. However, the only regret I have about that incident was that it was unprotected sex, but we had both had a lot to drink and were not thinking straight.

“For several months after that, I panicked because I was worried I could have been infected with HIV/AIDS or another sexually transmitted disease. When I eventually did a test and found out I was ‘clean’, I vowed never to be that reckless again. I still play the game, but I make sure the ‘dare’ is not something that would be detrimental to me or my health.”

A bank worker based in Akwa Ibom State, Nsikak Bassey, noted that she played the game while in the university. Though it did not have any repercussion; for several years, she was haunted by the fear that what she described as a “moment of indiscretion” could come back to hurt her.

She told Saturday PUNCH, “I was in my second year in the university when I first played the game. As an introvert, I rarely went out and had never attended a party in school up until that point, though I had heard of many of them.”

Bassey added that though she initially did not want to attend the rave, she caved in under the intense pressure from her roommates, and decided to go.

According to her, when they got there, everything went fine, and there was enough to eat and drink.

“However, at some point, some guys in final year walked into the party and they complained that it was too boring.

“They then suggested that we should play some games. We first played charade games, where we had to guess different things. But after some rounds, they claimed that was also becoming boring. That was when one of them suggested that we should play ‘Truth or Dare’.

“Prior to that time, I had never heard of the game but some others seemed interested and excited, so I decided to play along.

“The rules were that anyone that would not tell the “truth” or carry out a “dare” would have to drink some alcohol.

“When it got to my turn, I was told to rub a guy’s hair and cheeks. Since it was a relatively mild act, I did it, even though I felt very uncomfortable.

“When it got to my turn again, I was told to “French-kiss” another guy, but I blatantly refused. I was then told to drink some alcohol, which I did.

“After that, I began to feel tipsy and more uninhibited.

“During the next round, another guy was asked to kiss me and fondle my breasts in the presence of everyone. I refused but the guy said he was ready to do it. The others put pressure on me and I eventually allowed him to do it.

“Though it felt weird, I also derived some sort of perverse satisfaction from the act, probably because of the alcohol I had taken.

“However, after the party, I started feeling guilty. And I prayed never to run into the guy again, or even any of those that attended the party.

“I was in the Faculty of Science, and when I learnt that the guy was in the Faculty of Arts, can you believe I never stepped foot in that faculty until I graduated? That was how guilty I felt. I also prayed that we never had any mutual friends or acquaintances. Though I never saw him again, his face is still etched in my memory. Thank God social media was not as prevalent as it is now, pictures or videos could have made it to the Internet and embarrassed me for life. How can it be heard that a pastor’s daughter participated in such an immoral game?”

‘Truth or Dare cost me my fiancé’

Unlike Fave Girl and Bassey, not everybody who plays the game leaves unscathed. If a Computer Science graduate and entrepreneur, Itunu Daramola (not real name), could turn back the hands of time, she would gladly reverse it to the day before December 17, 2015.

As a final year student of the University of Nigeria Nsukka, Enugu State, she was excited that she was finally going to graduate from the school, having spent four gruelling years studying for her degree.

Basking in the excitement of the period, she attended several parties thrown by different faculties and departments to celebrate their impending exit from the school.

One of the parties started on a high note like the others, but she didn’t know the outcome would change her life.

In her words, “It was a programme for final year students of a particular department, and everything was going fine. We had plenty to eat and drink, and being one that is quite lightheaded, I was already getting drunk. After the programme, we proceeded for the after party.”

It was while at the party that they played the ‘Truth or Dare’ game. She recalled that buoyed by the excitement, there were several wild dares. When it got to her turn, she was “dared” to “do whatever it takes to turn on” another guy in the party.

“With an unusual boldness fuelled by the alcohol, I promptly sat on the guy, and began to do a lap dance. He claimed that he was not aroused, and people in the crowd encouraged him to fondle my boobs. As he did that, I was also egged on to kiss him, and I did that. I was too drunk to notice that people were taking pictures and recording videos.

“The rest of that night was a blur, and it was my friend that filled me in on everything that happened the next morning. Barely 30 minutes later, I got a message from my fiancé who was based in the United States of America. It was a video of the Truth or Dare session at the party. He stated that his brother sent it to him, and that I had embarrassed him before his family members,” she said, the tinge of regret unmistakable in her voice.

According to her, though she begged him severally and sent several emissaries, he blatantly refused to even speak to her after that day, much less listen to what she had to say.

“That was how the trajectory of my life changed, because I was supposed to join him in the US after the National Youth Service Corps programme,” she sighed in pain.

“Everybody got to know about what happened, and I became a subject of mockery in school, church, neighbourhood, family and practically every other place. I was seen as a wayward girl who had a promising relationship with a good man, and threw it all away recklessly,” she continued.

Daramola added that she had to move away to another state, and practically start life afresh.

“I still haven’t got married but I think my heart has healed, though it took over seven years for that to happen. However, whenever I hear any mention of that game, I get filled with anger. I always advise young people to stay away from it.

“When I heard of the Lande story, I almost shed tears because it brought back painful memories. My man at the time also felt that I had betrayed him deeply.”

The role of social media

There is no gainsaying the fact that social media has played an immense role in the current boost in popularity that the game is enjoying.

Interestingly, the game has evolved with various twists on the different social media platforms.

With its short-form video format, TikTok has made it easy for users to record and share their dares, often leading to viral trends. Hashtags such as #TruthOrDareChallenge and #DareMe have gained traction at different times, encouraging users to participate in bold and creative challenges.

Many TikTok influencers have incorporated ‘Truth or Dare’ into their content, drawing in massive engagement from followers eager to see their favourite creators tackle daring tasks. The thrill of watching these challenges unfold in real-time has made the game more appealing than ever.

On X (formerly Twitter), the game has taken on a different form, with users participating in text-based versions of the pastime. Public figures and social media influencers often initiate ‘Truth or Dare’ threads, where followers are invited to ask or respond to questions and dares. These engagements often lead to viral moments, further cementing the game’s popularity in Nigerian digital culture.

Instagram and Snapchat Stories have become another hotspot for ‘Truth or Dare’ interactions. Through anonymous question features and interactive stickers, users can challenge their friends to reveal secrets or complete dares. The temporary nature of Stories allows for playful experimentation while reducing the fear of long-term repercussions.

The celebrity factor

Social media influencers and other celebrities have also played a significant role in popularising the game. Skit makers, including TikTok, Instagram and YouTube personalities, often incorporate the game into their content.

The game has been played on different seasons of the wildly popular Big Brother Naija reality show as well.

Gen Z phenomenon

People born between 1997 and 2012 are often referred to as Gen Z (or Zoomers). Beyond being a nomenclature for a specific demographic, that “title” has become associated with anyone who possesses a wide range of peculiarities including, but not limited to being non-conformist, tech savvy, bold, outspoken, opinionated, aggressive, rude, wild and irrepressible.

According to a psychologist, Dare Akindele, this age group has grown up in an era of hyper-connectivity, where digital interactions are just as significant as face-to-face encounters; thus several factors explain why they have embraced ‘Truth or Dare’ so fervently.

For many of them, the thrill of the game is in the spontaneity it offers. A 27-year-old digital analyst, who identified himself only as IK, told our correspondent that unlike scripted social media content, he likes the excitement and suspense the game brings.

“The game introduces an element of unpredictability. It thrives on spontaneity, offering people like me an escape from the curated perfection of online life. Whether it’s a funny dare or a scandalous truth, the game provides moments of unfiltered authenticity,” he said.

IK also noted that at a time when physical socialising had become less frequent due to factors such as busy schedules and economic constraints, the game served as a bonding tool. He told Saturday PUNCH, “Online versions of the game allow players to connect with friends and strangers alike, strengthening digital communities across Nigeria.”

A 22-year-old digital marketer, Chantel (surname withheld), argued that the game encourages self expression.

“It allows young people to express themselves freely, breaking away from societal taboos and traditional constraints.

“It also boosts creativity, because many dares require participants to think outside the box, enhancing their creativity and problem-solving skills.

“In a country where economic challenges and social pressures are prevalent, this game offers a lighthearted escape, and I don’t think that’s such a big deal,” she noted.

Impact on society

As far as a 47-year-old teacher and mother of three, Mary Ifijeh, is concerned, there is no positive side to the game.

She said, “The dares can become extreme, leading to uncomfortable situations or online shaming.

“With the game being played online, there is also a risk of sensitive information being exposed. Most of these young people don’t know what they are doing. And if they are not careful, many of them will sadly regret these private pictures and videos they are putting online in the name of social media content.”

Another teacher and Christian youth leader, Biodun Shonubi, was of the opinion that the game had a sinister undertone.

He told our correspondent, “My thoughts on the Truth or Dare game is that it’s a devilish game. It is not meant for children at all. Whether some people like it or not, the game has an undertone. People might look at it as just a game, but I feel it is orchestrated by evil people to lure people into doing bad things.

“I don’t see any reason you would be playing a game with somebody, and you would dare the person to do something nasty and evil; which the person would ordinarily not do. And in an attempt to be bold, they would go ahead to do it. Imagine if a person is ‘dared’ to punch someone, and the person punched dies. Does that not become a police case?”

Shonubi stated that though he had never experienced the children around him playing the game, he actively discouraged it.

He recalled that when the game went viral, he and other teachers sentitised the youth around them.

“We told them about the dangers in the game, so that they would not be lured into playing it, and even if they had heard about it before and were planning to play it, they would have a change of mind.”

He also insisted that there was no positive side to the game. “Some people claim that it makes one bold. Bold to do what? It makes people bold to do something negative. I advise parents and teachers to teach their children about the evil inherent in that game,” he said.

Shonubi further admonished parents to be “alive to their responsibilities”, and guide their children appropriately.

A social media expert, Femi Aladeloba, was of the view that with advancements in technology and the continued influence of social media, the game would likely evolve even further.

“However, there is a need for a balance between fun and safety,” he cautioned.

He stressed that parents, educators and influencers should play a role in guiding young Nigerians on responsible participation.

According to him, content moderation and awareness campaigns could help mitigate the risks associated with extreme dares and online exposure.

A psychologist, Ruth Ibaka, noted that the game could have both positive and negative psychological effects on young people, particularly in the areas of risk-taking and peer pressure.

According to her, the “truth” and “dares” did not always have to be negative.

She said, “The game can push players out of their comfort zones, encouraging them to take social and sometimes physical risks.

“This can build confidence and reduce social anxiety, as they become more comfortable being the centre of attention or doing silly tasks.

“However, it can also normalise impulsivity if dares become reckless, leading to risky behaviour in real-life situations.”

Ibaka also cautioned that the game could reinforce peer pressure. “Since players often don’t want to seem weak or boring,” she opined. “They could feel pressured to accept dares that make them uncomfortable. The desire for social acceptance can lead to crossing personal boundaries, which may later contribute to difficulty saying “no” in other situations, such as substance use and unhealthy relationships,” she said.

Reflecting on the long-term effects, the psychologist who has three teenage children, said, “If played in a supportive and respectful environment, it can build resilience and confidence.

“However, if the game becomes toxic or exploitative, it may reinforce poor decision-making or a fear of standing up to peer pressure.”